losing your marbles.

It's official... I think my classmates and I have lost our marbles.

Below is a string of messages between one of my classmates and I. In fairness the AC was broke and I'm quite certain the room was at least 150 degrees, surely this had to have something to do with our delirium?

Jeaven: Has she talked about what technique we'd use to maximize profits based on conjoint? Tara: enlgish? Jeaven: Beautiful explaination of WTP by feature, but in reality I'm going to offer these skus to all segments. each will have different WTP. How do I set optimal price? Has she talked about that? Oh I see.nevermind. DMD curve kinda gets you there, but you want to find profit max/rev max/what ever points. chicky made me sleeeppyyy if my head hits the desk, pls wake me up Tara: i have a zone bar, do you want it Jeaven: and again it's 105 degrees in here Tara: must. stay. awake. yea sweating bullets here. Jeaven: beach ball and corona by my side Tara: ahhaha Tara: this sucks Jeaven: i want to walk out. dying Tara: patron at break? 3 more hrs are you kidding me Jeaven: this is death by 1000 cuts Tara: light me on fire and throw me out the window Jeaven: that was freakin funny. OMG. you !! Tara: why ? Jeaven: who the hell says that?. only one person I know Tara: what did i say? hahahaha... just sent this email to mom: sounds good. i tried to be nice and start my laundry for you so you wouldnt have so much to do. i got one big load done today. all gym. clothes. saved my work for when i have time to iron. good job Tara! 3 more hours of class this week. SO MUCH HW to do this weekend. unreal. havent slept in days. delerious. 5 months left. we are throwing party when im done. BIG party. am launching all fireworks in garage. champagne. CELEBRATEEEEEEEEEEEe. must. stay. awake. in. class. Jeaven: memoirs of a mad man and woman Tara: hahah Jeaven: add to our book archives Tara: title for my book. hahahaha. great minds think alike Jeaven: ;-) Tara: its so hot in here i am dying Jeaven: close your eyes and imagine your on top of the pyramids, that's what I'm doing Tara: omg. you jerk. omg. im dying. im gonna have to leave. im shedding layers over here like its my job Jeaven: sorry that was a bit over the top. break time only level. my bad Tara: i about lost it. i was hiding behind my papers Jeaven: but the good thing is I didn't even have to bribe the security guard 4 dollars Tara: pretty sure i just fell asleep sitting up and snorted myself awake Jeaven: thought you might have gotten bored and started to play this little piggy Tara: hahaha Jeaven: old school move Tara: ridiculous Tara: i hate you Jeaven: can u send me spreadsheet when class is over? I need to review Tara: yes. its got all my notes thus far from this kind of stuff. sweating bullets over here my temp really got high after that email Jeaven: me too Tara: i may blog that FYI Jeaven: I have the shakes. do it. funniest thing ever. or maybe I'm just going crazy!!!!! Tara: or maybe we all are Jeaven: welcome to crazytown! Whooohaaooooaaaa Tara: i cant take it Tara: 15 mins i hope she lets us PRAC folks go. this is unreal Jeaven: I had to eat all the M&M's your poured on my notes in order to turn the page........this has only made me more unstable......but I have also realized M&M's are far more enjoyable when served warm......the chocolate seems to be of almost Belgian quality......back to meditating on the pyramids now........PS...the backs of my hands are even sweating.....what does that mean??? Tara: time to GO still here. ticking away. tick. tock. tick tock. tick tock.

This will tug on your heartstrings.

A friend shared a link to this American Idol audition. Now first off let me say for those of you that will immediately dismiss this post and link because it has anything to do with AI, DONT. I didn't post the link or write this blog because of some singing show. I wrote it because I was lost for words at the story that is told. Now take 5 minutes, watch, and learn. Click HERE

Marriage is a sacred thing. It is a commitment to love someone unconditionally for the rest of your life. In sickness and health. In good times and bad. Till death do you part. I believe that too many people in today's world take this for granted. When times get tough we walk away, unwilling to stay and put forth the effort and hard work that will push you through the bad times. Society has created an evil outlet, divorce. It is an escape route and excuse.

What I love so much about this brief story is the expression of unfailing and undying love and devotion the man has for the woman. He could easily have left her, most people wouldn't fault him for it. But he chose to stay. He hadn't made the vows, yet, but in his heart of hearts he recognized that when he made that promise to marry her, the vows, the commitment, it had already begun. And he didn't just stay for any sense of obligation, he did it out of love. He did it because deep down he'd found his soulmate, and regardless of whether she would ever walk, talk, or be healed, he was going to be hers forever. He made a promise and he stuck to it, not because he had to, but because he wanted to.

Now that is love.

One day, I hope I am lucky enough to find a man who will love me like that....

T

FIT GIRL

Today's agenda: brunch, a bit of HW, a meeting, and grinding out a grueling mountain bike ride.

You can find me, for most of the day, on my bike, weaving around the rough mountain terrain. Grinding on the petals, heart racing, adrenaline pumping.... so so thrilling.

Most people don't understand the lifestyle of a fit person. They thing we spend far too much time on our "hobby." That right there is the problem in itself, most don't understand the disconnect between hobby and lifestyle. For me being active, fit, and healthy is just that, its a lifestyle. It is a big part of who I am. "Aren't you worried you missing out on your life?" I was just asked yesterday...

My response... HELL no.

I'm too busy LIVING my life. Searching for the next adrenaline rush. Pushing myself and my body day in and day out. I fuel it with good food, good wine, and lots of laughter. And then I go, and go, and go. To the gym. On a run. To the mountains. On the bike. Up the hills. Speeding down the trails. On the pitch. In the water. On the slopes. Wherever the adventure and the thrill of exerting that last bit of energy takes me.

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

You might call me crazy. I just call myself a... FIT GIRL

you can find the good in anybody if you just give them a chance,

the benefit from the doubt. sometimes people disappoint you,

sometimes they surprise you, but you never really get to know

them until you listen to what's in their hearts. ♥

Life Is Supposed To Be Amazing...

Life is supposed to be amazing. It is supposed to be happy. It is supposed to be loving. It is supposed to be wonderful. Life is not supposed to be gloomy, depressing, chaotic, dangerous, malicious, or heartbreaking. So why then are most of us plagued by precariously un-amazing lives? Do we make them that way? Probably. We have all heard the term life is what you make of it. Life is about choice, perspective, and attitude. If you want an amazing life, make it that way. Yes we all encounter bumps and road blocks along our quest for the perfect life but the real testiment is how we choose to react to them. Do we learn from them, move along, put a smile on our face and continue to relish in the blessed life we have. Or do we allow all these trials to deflate our souls. The heart and soul of an amazing life is within all of us, it is just up to us to let it shine bright and free.

The choice is yours, what are you going to do with it?

Paris

My friend shared this with me... absolutely wonderful idea... (Papa, take notes!!!)

"My dad took me to Paris for the weekend. We had the most amazing time. On the plane back to London he asked me, "Do you know why I took you to Paris, only you and me?" And I said, "Why?" And he said, "Because I wanted you to see Paris for the first time with a man who you know will love you for the rest of your life. ♥ "

And here, after all that, is what I have come to believe about beauty: Beauty comes from variety, from specificity, from the fact that no person in the world looks exactly like anyone else. I believe that when you love someone, they become beautiful to you. I believe the eyes see everything through the heart & nothing in the world feels as good as resting them on someone you love... ♥ Katherine Center

Heart

Thursday, January 13, 2011

The Great Stories

Notice that all the great stories pretty much follow the same story line. Things were once good, then something awful happened, and now a great battle must be fought or a journey taken. At just the right moment (which feels like the last possible moment), a hero comes and sets things right, and life is found again.

It's true of every fairy tale, every myth, every Western, every epic-just about every story you can think of, one way or another. Braveheart, Titanic, the Star Wars series,Gladiator, The Lord of the Rings trilogy. They pretty much all follow the same story line.

Have you ever wondered why?

Every story, great and small, shares the same essential structure because every story we tell borrows its power from a Larger Story, a Story woven into the fabric of our being-what pioneer psychologist Carl Jung tried to explain as archetype, or what his more recent popularizer Joseph Campbell called myth.

All of these stories borrow from the Story. From Reality. We hear echoes of it through our lives. Some secret written on our hearts. A great battle to fight, and someone to fight for us. An adventure, something that requires everything we have, something to be shared with those we love and need.

There is a Story that we just can't seem to escape. There is a Story written on the human heart.

(Epic, 12-13)

~ Ransomed Heart

... on the road....

"I have lots of things to teach you now, in case we ever meet,
concerning the message that was transmitted to me under a pine tree
in North Carolina on a cold winter moonlit night. It said that
Nothing Ever Happened, so don't worry. It's all like a dream.
Everything is ecstasy, inside. We just don't know it because of our thinking-minds.
But in our true blissful essence of mind is known that everything is alright
forever and forever and forever. Close your eyes, let your hands
and nerve-ends drop, stop breathing for 3 seconds, listen to the silence
inside the illusion of the world, and you will remember the lesson
you forgot, which was taught in immense milky way soft cloud innumerable worlds
long ago and not even at all. It is all one vast awakened thing. I call it the golden eternity.
It is perfect. We were never really born, we will never really die. It has nothing to do
with the imaginary idea of a personal self, other selves, many selves everywhere:
Self is only an idea, a mortal idea. That which passes into everything is one thing.
It's a dream already ended. There's nothing to be afraid of and nothing to be glad about.
I know this from staring at mountains months on end. They never show any expression,
they are like empty space. Do you think the emptiness of space will ever crumble away?
Mountains will crumble, but the emptiness of space, which is the one universal essence
of mind, the vast awakenerhood, empty and awake, will never crumble away because
it was never born."

Jack Kerouac

Beauty

Beauty is the summation of parts that work together in such a way that nothing needs to be addd, changed, or altered.

You are beautiful.

The quote was given to me, I'm not sure exactly who said it, but it was an Italian painter who was also a police inspector.

As I've grown up I've tried to shape my character to be one that displays internal beauty. I'm far from perfect and am the first one to admit that I have many flaws, but despite these imperfections, sometimes it's just nice to know that others see past the exterior into the beauty that lies within the heart and soul....

So to all you readers out there, take the time to look around you, look beyond what the eyes initially see, look far past that. Look deep into another's soul, for there may lie the beauty you've been waiting for. For there may lie a mirror reflecting you.

YOU are beautiful too. :)

xo!

T

The Third Place

There's this place that I go, its not home, its not the office, its my place... you know...my spot. According to sociologist Ray Oldenburg third places are informal public gathering spots where people can feel at home. They are core settings of informal public life and have been likened to the Greek agora and the Roman Forum. We all have one of these places, our third place. Each of us has our own. For many its a local coffee shop where one goes, is greeted by name and the customized beverage of choice is waiting, silent swirls of steam, comfy leather couches, and wafting aromas entice you stay awhile.

When I was younger my place was the soccer field. It was my passion, my glory, my comfort, and my home away from home. There were many days after practice when I'd walk out into the middle of the field lay back, rest my head against my ball and think about the world. As I've grown up my place has evolved just as I have. My place, now, isn't the coffee shop. It's not the local restaurant. It's not the pub just around the corner. My place quite frankly is out of the way. I drive 20 minutes out of my way to get there and I'm just fine with that because, well, its my place! My third place is quite fitting for the life of a FITgirl. It's the gym (Downtown Sac 24!!), and not just because of the amount of time I spend there. In fact the amount of time spent there really has nothing to do with it at all. Its the feeling I get when I arrive, am greeted with a warm, welcoming, smile and occasionally a high five. It's where I go when I need a smile. It's where I go when I need to curse the world and crank up that tredmill a few notches higher. It's part of my daily routine and when for some reason I can't make it, something in my life just doesn't feel quite right. The stars become misaligned, my world is thrown into chaos and confusion.

Some might say that DSac 24 can't be a third place as it does not meet the traditional criteria of one. While the gym certainly is not a traditional third place environment being that it lacks the physicality of a "home"... there are no couches, chairs, or lounging places... it seems as if the culture cultivated at this particular establishment has allowed it to become one anyways. It's not just the friendly staff that make it my place, its the regulars too. We see the familiar faces, we know each others routines, and we pause to take a break in between sets to ask about each others lives. There's a reason I drive out of my way and past two other gyms (of the same brand)... DSac, for me, has the right combination of people and atmosphere to make it come alive. From a business standpoint this is the epitomy of success... how do we maintain revenues? We start by offering outstanding service in a hospitable environment. How do we do that? How do we continue to grow cash flows and at the same time remain small enough to be able to offer an authentic, welcoming environment for our customers. I'd say it all starts with the people. You begin with an effective leader, one who can select the right candidates and train these employees to give the customer a humanized experience. Together that team cultivates a culture where customers are valued, hard work is appreciated, and teamwork is the foundation for success. Authentically maintain those standards and you have the makings for a third place.

So now I ask you... Where do you go? What's your place? I hope you have one, you should!

And hey, to all who work so hard to make my place everything that it is, here's a great big thank you. Sometimes, when we don't even realize it, the smallest gestures have the most profound influences on other peoples lives.

XO!

T

Paradigm Shift: The Prequil

There comes a point in many people's lives when they can no longer deny the fact that something is missing, something is broken, or there has to be something more. Many of us experience this, the little voice in the back of our head. The negativity, condescending, frustrated part of our soul screaming at us. It's the stuff that keeps us up at night. Most people, like me, ignore it. We occupy our time with more tasks, we sign up for more extra-curriculars, we do anything and everything to avoid that sinking feeling (there has to be something more) because acknowledging that will force us to acknowledge the fact that something is not right. It's not necessarily the fear that change must occur that keeps us from accepting the fact that our souls are thirsty... it's the knowledge that this kind of deep routed, dramatic, shift in ideals/perspectives/outlooks will not come easy. Put simply, a paradigm shift is difficult. You don't just wake up one day and say "my life was this, and today it is exponentially different." It takes work, commitment, and accountability. Transforming the way you view the world is deliberate and time consuming. So how do we do it? Well we start with a lot of introspection. You have to be honest with yourself, look deep inside your heart and answer a few questions: who am I? what do I want? what do I value? and what do I need?... It starts with a personal retreat where you allow yourself the time to clear your mind and define what it is you want in life. And then, once you've realized who you are and what you want, then you begin formulating the plan for putting all those pieces into place.

Paradigm Shift Part One

This post will not be eloquent. Usually I take some time trying to formulate my thoughts in a well versed way. Sometimes you just have to get down and dirty and get straight to the point!

One of my first actions of the new year and the new me begins with a purging of all the garbage in my life. I like to say this actually started two weeks ago when body told me ENOUGH. I was laid up in bed for 10 days unable to move or do anything as I felt as if I was on my death bed. During this time I realized the necessity to ramp up some of the components of my paradigm shift. I can no longer try to do everything and be everything for everybody, especially for those who won't do the same in return for me. I began my first "purge" of the people that don't have a place in my life. This one was easy, I simply went to my Facebook account and if I had no idea who you were, ADIOS you were gone. Merely ridding those I actually don't know is not enough. One thing I realized in 2010 is that I don't have time in my life for people who don't have time for me. I will no longer maintain friendships with people who want to be there for me when it is convenient for them. I will no longer maintain friendships with people who have to fill their lives with drama in order to feel important, I don't have time for that, nor do I appreciate it. I will no longer maintain friendships with people who are just too busy to make me an important part of their life. Friendships and romance are about quality, not about quantity. If you want me to be a part of your life, you better show it. I have a lot of love to give to all my friends, and I make a point and an effort to tell those people I value them. There is no such thing as convenient friendships for me. Along those lines, I will no longer waste my time on people who have to "decide" if they want to be with me or want me to be a part of their life. That is just garbage!

Now for most of you reading this, you probably have nothing to worry about. In fact you will be thinking, ITS ABOUT TIME Tara... but for the handful of you who read this and think "omg did I make the cut?" maybe you should do some introspection about the value you place on your friendships. Do you make your friends a priority? Or is your life so self centered that you only have time for you? Think about it. At some point in our lives our friendship pools start getting smaller. We develop a few high quality relationships with friends and they become part of our family. Keep these people close, they are the ones that will always be there for you, they are your second family. As we grow older and our free time becomes less and less, why waste that on people who when the going gets tough are too busy to lend a hand to you. Why waste it on people who are always looking for something better to come around and use you as their last resort. I'm sorry maybe it sounds rude but sorry, if this is you, I no longer have time for you.

The purge, its in effect and an on-going process... don't let this be you.

1.1.11

Helloooooo 2011 I have been waiting for you! A new year, a new start, new goals and resolutions, and a new me! I have a lot to look forward to this year, I'm going to make some pretty big things happen! And lets face it, while there were a few high moments, 2010, you SUCKED!

Ok Ok first things first, yes 2010 wasn't terrible, and yes I am extremely grateful for all the fortunes and blessings bestowed upon me. yes there were a few highs although some unbelievably low moments in my life. Can't help but have my eyes fixed toward 2011... A year of a paradigm shift. A year where I put myself and my needs first. A year fixed on the happiness and pleasures of my life. A year focused on the little moments that drive that happiness, not the milestones, to do lists, and grandeous accomplishments that have fueled it in the past. If there's one thing 2010 has taught me it's that yes I have the Job and the house and the education, but all that is relative. True success and true happiness comes from loving yourself and your life in all the little moments.... It's evenings spent with friends over the dinner table and bottles of wine, it's the sunday morning lovers stroll hand in hand, it's the satisfaction of of doing absolutley nothing because you deserve a break.

La Dulce Far Niente. The sweetness of doing nothing.

To 2011.... It's MY year. I think I've worked hard enough and earned the right to be hopeful for a year where I can begin to form the puzzle pieces of my life the way I want them to be. That doesn't mean I'm not grateful for where I am today and the life path bestowed to me... It's just means I've recognized my true happiness needs a bit more cultivation than where I'm at now.

Now to the good stuff, the Paradigm Shift. My good friend and mentor JK is a brilliant and powerful businessman. We often talk business, relationships, and life. We've both had our fair share of personal "beatings" (both literal and figuratively) this year. A few months ago he discussed the idea of a paradigm shift and defined it as such:

PARADIGM SHIFT DEFINED (Georgetown): The term "paradigm shift" has found uses in other contexts, representing the notion of a major change in a certain thought-pattern — a radical change in personal beliefs, complex systems or organizations, replacing the former way of thinking or organizing with a radically different way of thinking or organizing.

In early December I decided to take the plunge and the formulation of the paradigm shift began. I spent the month doing some introspection, searching deep inside my heart and soul, and putting the pieces into place for this great year. For those of you wondering why I did not blog this past month, it was purposeful. I have waited for today to unveil this change, I found it fitting to do it this way.

2011 the year of the paradigm shift. Yes I have my resolutions which aren't really all that different than they normally are: maintain a health/fitness lifestyle, finish my mba, make my house my home, complete a 48 hour retreat, run a marathon, complete a fitness competition (this may get pushed to 2012), spend more time with my family, travel the world... ok you get the point.

the real change is something inside of me. its my way of defining and perceiving the world and my role in it. its the way i define and perceive my happiness in life. its the way i define my expectations of life, love, friendships, and everything in between. its spending time on the important things in life, not just checking things off my to do lists. yes i'll still have the lists and goals and crazy dreams i'll chase (part of that is inherent in my character), but priorities are being re-arranged. when you learn the hard way about the importance you place on some things you learn painfully and quickly what is really important in life: family, love, happiness, and faith.... everything else is relative.

so here's to 2011, I am so glad you're here! I am so excited for the new beginnings, new possibilities, the excitement, and adventure that I know you'll bring. I have so much planned for you, but not so much that we can't get it all done! This is the year for ME and big things are going to happen, watch out, lightning may strike :)

Happy 2011 everyone, I hope this year brings all that you wish of it, but most importantly I hope 2011 brings you LIFE, LOVE, LAUGHTER, and HAPPINESS.

T